Category Archives: comedy

The Dude Never Dies – The Big Lebowski in Japanese

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I wrote for Let’s Go Japan during the summer of 2003. There were five or six of us writing that summer, and we all flew in to Tokyo before heading out in different directions. I went to Kamakura, Yokohama and Nagoya before heading to Shikoku, where I spent most of my two-month itinerary.

At first I was disappointed about being assigned to such a rural place; I’d only been to Japan once before and had only been able to spend a week or so in Tokyo, so I felt like I was missing out. Only later would I know how lucky I was to spend a month traveling around the highly underrated Shikoku, half of that with the refreshing freedom of a car.

While the landscape was breathtaking and the people were friendly, moving from town to town every day or two quickly became lonesome. I called the office a lot, called home a lot, and fortunately a Bulgarian friend in Nagoya hooked me up with some downloads to help me distract myself. He gave me a couple anime series and a movie or two, but I spent most of my time watching The Big Lebowski, which I’d been a fan of since renting it in ’98. Honestly, that summer alone I must’ve watched Lebowski a dozen times at least. I knew all the ins and outs of the film and even felt some 運命ness; there’s a Townes VanZandt version of the song “Dead Flowers” towards the end of the film, and a vinyl record bar I went to in Nagoya played a couple songs from Sticky Fingers.

(Did you know that in the dream sequence when the Dude gets knocked out by Maude’s goons, you can see that Maude was the one who rolled the ball?

)

So, equipped with a Region 2 DVD player, I’ve taken it upon myself to check out the localization of the movie. A couple weekends ago I watched it – twice. Once with the English language track and Japanese subtitles, and then again with the Japanese dubbing. This may not be a surprise to those familiar with Japan’s movie industry, but the dubbed version was notably better.

Not that the translation of the subtitles was poor. Not being a native speaker, I can’t speak for it completely, but in my biased opinion, it was good and caught a lot of the nuances of the film, even getting laughs out of my Japanese roommates.

But the dubbed translation itself was more accurate and creative. For example, when the Big Lebowski grills the Dude for fucking up the bag drop, the Dude says “We (おれたち) did drop the money,” eliciting a “We?” The subtitles are fairly 文字通り, getting close enough to the Dude’s “royal we” excuse, but the dubbed version goes with some creative Japanese: 「おれっち。言うでしょう？地方なんか行くと。」

The dubbed version does have a major advantage – time. As with subtitles in any language, you have to allow time for the viewer to read and comprehend the line, and when you have a movie with quick dialogue, it’s difficult to capture the feel with subtitles alone. Additionally, the fact that much of the dialogue in this movie is simultaneous makes the subtitles especially ineffective. You can hear the Japanese voices trying to speak over each other in the dubbed version, really helping express Walter’s frustration with Donny.

It also helped that the voice acting was absolutely impeccable; the accuracy with which the voice actors arranged their lines over Jeff Bridges’ and John Goodman’s mouthing was nothing short of incredible, and all of the give and take was more accurately portrayed with the dubbing.

But even the dubbed version misses parts of the critical element that really brings the film together – the role of discourse.

In the very first scene at the grocery store, President Bush on the screen drops the line “This aggression will not stand,” which the Dude later recycles when he confronts the Big Lewbowski. (“I do mind. The Dude minds. This will not stand…ya know. This aggression will not stand, man.”) The dubbed version catches this, reusing 侵攻／侵略 and variations of 許さない, but the subtitled version misses it.

Both miss the Dude’s final line of the movie, “The Dude abides.” This line the Dude recycles from when he was confronted by the Big Lebowksi – “I will not abide another toe.” The subtitled version uses ご免 and the dubbed 許さん for the first scene. In the final scene, the subtitled version has the cowboy say 「元気でな。気をつけて。」to which the Dude responds,

Whereas in the dubbed version the Dude responds with a less intrusively translated 「それがヂュードだし」 to 「気軽にやるんだよ。言うまでもないか。」 Neither relays the idea that the Dude has borrowed terminology yet again.

So what’s the point? The point is that The Big Lebowski is a subtly political film that shows the infectious role of discourse in society and how that discourse is often misrepresentation that leads to innocent victims. Unfortunately, the Japanese subtitles and dubbing don’t fully express this underlying theme of discourse, although I did learn the awesome curse word くそ食らえ.

Discourse

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Well, it’s Election Day back in the States, so I thought we’d look at party names in translation.

The Republican Party – 共和党 (きょうわとう)

Unsure here, but this looks like a direct translation. 共和 is also used in a lot of country names, such as the Republic of Afghanistan (アフガニスタン共和国) and the Republic of Guatemala (グアテマラ共和国). Exciting.

Break it down by kanji and you get the “together-peace party.” Hmm…suspect.

The Democratic Party – 民主党 (みんしゅとう)

Here we have another direct translation. 民主主義 (みんしゅしゅぎ) is democracy, the theory, and looking on ALC for 民主 delivers a horde of political discourse.

Breaking it down by kanji gives us the “people’s-sovereignty party.” (Yes, the 主 is for 主権, sovereignty.) Hmm…suspect.

Honestly, party names themselves have so little meaning, that direct translation is the only way to go. We are so divorced from the moment when they actually meant something that they only seem like rusty, old institutions, starting to creak with age beneath the weight of generations.

Discourse, my friends, is a lie in any language.

Bonus Links – すべらない話

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Here are some bonus Youtube links for this wonderful Wednesday – some clips from Hitoshi Matsumoto’s すべらない話. The premise is simple: Matsumoto rolls the die and whoever’s name appears tells a story. It’s probably the closest thing that Japan has to Western stand-up comedy. Very funny: 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10, 11.

If you’re looking for a particular comedian, here’s a quick reference:

2: Junior Chiharu, Hosshan
3: Ken Yahagi, Matsumoto, Haruna Kondō, Matsumoto, Junior Chiharu
4: Daisuke Miyagawa, Ryūji Akiyama, Atsuhiko Nakata
5: Matsumoto, Kendō Kobayashi, Haruna Kondō, Masaru Hamaguchi
6: Kazutoyo Koyabu, Teppei Arita
7: Onigiri, Hosshan, Junichi Kawamoto
8: Junichi Kawamoto, Sekai no Nabeatsu, Gori
9: Daiki Hyōdō, Masaru Hamaguchi, Atsuhiko Nakata

The other clips are setup and then the selection of the best story.

Cool Link – すべらない名無し

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2channel is a Japanese internet forum. You can try browsing it yourself, but it’s massive and seems like it would take a long time to find exactly what you’re looking for. After you click on the main graphic, there is a huge list of topics on the left.

The other day while searching for examples of 差し入れ, I came across a blog that seems to cull the funniest posts from 2channel and post them as blog entries – すべらない名無し. It’s kind of an Overheard in New York for 2channel.

The topics vary but are almost always funny. It proves that Steven Segal provides just as much unintentional comedy in Japan as anywhere else. You can also read about the displeasures of fellatio, the misfortune of setting your 変換, and how to make hilarious manga titles by adding/changing one character. Recommended reading. The comments are generally fun, too.

名無し (ななし) refers to the name, or lack of name, of the posters on 2ch. Almost everyone posts anonymously, and the default anonymous name is 名無し or some funny reworking of 名無し; in the literature section, for example, it is 我輩は名無しである, a pun on a Soseki novel. すべらない you might recognize from Hitoshi Matsumoto’s すべらない話. I’m unsure if it’s related to 滑る, which has the same pronunciation and means “to slip,” but even if it’s not, that’s an easy way to remember what it means – if it slips (すべる), it’s not funny; if it doesn’t slip (すべらない), it’s funny. So basically the title means “Funny No-names.”

Boobs

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With the goal of stirring up even more interest in Murakami between now and mid-October, when the Nobel Prizes are announced, I will post a small piece of unpublished Murakami translation once a week from now until the announcement.


 

Murakami (Do I even need to tell you which one?) lived in Europe for three years between 1986 and 1989. In addition to novels and short stories, he also wrote a lengthy set of travel writings called Tōi taiko (遠い太鼓, A Distant Drum).

During his travels he spent some time on a small Greek island, and the tourists there often sunbathed nude. Apparently only the local Greek men (he calls them "Zorba Greeks") went to the trouble of checking out the boobs. This resulted in a three-page discussion of nude sunbathing and the following moment of complete linguistic genius:

おっぱいを出すのも勝手なら、出されたおっぱいを見るのも勝手である。

(I was going to write the page number at the end of that line, but when I realized it was page 69, I thought I’d better explain what I was doing.)

The Japanese is so economical that translating it won’t be as great, but here it goes:

If it’s a person’s prerogative to reveal her boobs, then it’s also a person’s prerogative to look at revealed boobs

That kind of expresses what’s going on with the verb. 出す literally means “take out,” but I translated it as “reveal” in order to maintain the verb tenses and still have the sentence sound okay, although, now that I think about it, “taken-out boobs” is a pretty funny phrase.

The major difference between the English and the Japanese is that no people are explicitly involved in the Japanese sentence; all of the subjects are implied, and he uses the loaded word 勝手 (かって). "Prerogative" feels a little complicated, but I guess it does the job. 勝手 is often used as an adverb (勝手に〜) to mean "do ~ however I want" or "do ~ even though I’m thinking only of myself and not the Japanese collective spirit." One word that pops up in the dictionary is "arbitrary." So does "one’s own way" and "selfishness."

So yes, long story short, if you reveal your boobs, do not be surprised when people look at them.

 

TGIF, I guess

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Sorry, everyone. I need a Friday.

TGIF doesn’t really exist in Japan, but I think the closest phrase is 「やっと金曜日なんだ！」 with the appropriate emphasis applied. I tried to teach TGIF to JHS kids for years but never got them to memorize it until I said that phrase somewhat dramatically…to the dismay of the Japanese teacher I was working with.

Oyster Day!

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Note: I wrote most of this before Gustav was even close to New Orleans.

In America (New Orleans?), we say you should only eat oysters in months that have an ‘R’ in them. That doesn’t stop us from eating dozens when we watch the basketball playoffs at Cooter Browns. Or from ordering the Peacemaker at Domilise’s in the middle of the summer. The real places (Casamento’s), however, are closed when it’s hot and raw oysters are more dangerous than they usually are.

Oysters in Japan are more of a December to February type food, but to hell with it, I declare today Oyster Day! September is the first month with an ‘R’ in it after May, June, July and August (incredible how that works, eh?), and today is the first day of September, so let’s go get oysters!

There’s a famous tongue twister about oysters in Japanese: 隣の客は、よくカキ食う客。(となりのきゃくは、よくかきくうきゃく。Tonari no kyaku wa, yoku kaki kuu kyaku. Translating tongue twisters is one of the most useless linguistic exercises that you can perform, but to hell with it, it means, “The customer next to us is a customer that eats a lotta oysters.” I guess that last bit sounds pretty cool – “ Eat a lotta oysters.” Oh, and the kanji for oysters, used mostly by restaurants with discriminating taste, are 牡蠣.)

Someone taught me that one the first time I came to Japan. It must’ve been at that point where they had exhausted my, at the time limited, range of conversation topics and had nothing better to do than make me say funny stuff for their own amusement. Shame on them. Actually, I should really be thanking them.

When you’re first starting to study a language, tongue twisters are a great way to exercise the muscles in your mouth. The muscles you use to speak Japanese are different from the English muscles, and they need training just like your pecs and gluts. Even if you don’t understand the meaning, the pronunciation practice will help you down the line.

Revisiting tongue twisters is a good way to test your progress. I heard this oyster one again recently but this time understood what was being said. It was a strange sensation. The sounds were no longer just sounds; there were specific meanings tied to all of them, and it wasn’t even that hard to say.

I haven’t decided where I’m going yet, but I’m debating between a place near Tokyo Station and another near Shinagawa Station. The former sells itself as a “gumbo and oyster” restaurant, whereas the latter is more convenient but is more like a New York oyster bar. If you’re in Tokyo and want to get oysters, get in touch!

What a Cool We Are!

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I completely forgot to mention the meaning of めちゃx２イケテいる. イケテいる is a verb that means "cool." If something is in the state of being cool, it is イケテいる. めちゃめちゃ makes it stronger. Young people use it often either as めちゃ or めちゃめちゃ, for example めちゃ寒い – damn cold or maybe even fucking cold. The show translates this as "What a Cool We Are!" although "We are Damn Cool!" is much less Engrishy.

Mecha-ike YouTube Dregs

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I have sifted through the YouTube offerings for you and found a decent selection of old Mecha-ike clips.

This guy, this guy, and this guy have a ton of videos. 

爆走数取団 – Counting Biker Gang

One game they don’t play anymore is called  爆走数取団 (ばくそうかずとりだん). This was my favorite game for a long, long time. The male members of the cast dress up like biker thugs and play a counting game. The first person says an object, for example "books," and the next person has to use the appropriate counter to count that object, so 一冊. He would then say a different object, say "CDs," and the following person would count that, 二枚. This continues until someone makes a mistake, at which point they have to fight a sumo wrestler. Sweet game. I remember seeing part of this episode where Akiko Wada cried: 1, 2, 3, 4, 5.

And here is the always unpredictable Ega-chan versus the sumo: 1, 2. 

色取り忍者 – Irotori Ninja

They have replaced 数取り with 色取り. Here are three clips I made introducing the  色取り忍者 (Irotori Ninja) Game and showing how it can be played at elementary school: 1, 2, 3. Also, a funny clip introducing the guest ninjas for that episode.

オッファー – Offers 

Once a year Okamura and Yabe both get "offers" where they do other jobs. Yabe has worked at an onsen, in a pastry shop, and as a manager for a fashion model among other things. Okamura has performed with SMAP and EXILE. In the fourth offer, he performed with a Chinese juggling troupe: 1, 2, 3 … this goes on to 13, so you can find the rest yourselves. And here’s are clips from Okamura’s offer with EXILE, which was hugely popular: 1, 2.

抜き打ちテスト – Pop Quiz

One of the other famous bits they do is the 抜き打ちテスト（ぬきうちテスト, pop quiz), where they surprise all the participants by giving them a test. Then they make fun of the stupid answers and crown the バカ of the group. They have played this game with numerous different groups, most recently with イケメン guys. Here is the first one they did: 1, 2, 3, 4.

もっとも受ける芸人は誰！ – Who is the Funniest Comedian!? 

I don’t think I’ve seen this kind of episode live, but it’s called もっとも受ける芸人は誰！(もっともうけるげいにんはだれ!). All the members get a chance to make a target audience laugh. There are four different episodes, each divided into several videos:

1: 1, 2, 3, 4

2: 1, 2, 3, 4, 5

3: 1, 2, 3, 4, 5 

4: 1, 2, 3, 4

笑わず嫌い王

This game is making fun of a game played by the manzai group とんねるず on one of their shows. They invite two celebrities and have them eat several dishes, one of which they hate. The other celebrity then has to guess which one the other didn’t like. This is similar, but they have to guess which comedian they didn’t like: 1, 2, 3, 4, 5.

油谷さん – Mr. Oil-Valley 

Here is Yamamoto’s famous 油谷さん (Aburatani-san, Mr. Oil-Valley). He would grease himself up and surprise a male staff member on their birthday or near the birth of a child: 0, 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8(*), 9 (These clips are a little frightening knowing that he was kicked off the show in 2007 after being accused of statutory rape. The charges were dropped after reaching a settlement, but not before he lost all his regular appearances and contract with Yoshimoto Kogyo. I haven’t researched it at all, but I think they stopped playing the motorcycle counting game once he left. Ah, a quick check on wikipedia shows that I’m right.)

* I vividly remember learning the meaning of オギャー from this clip. オギャー is the sound a baby makes when it is born.